Wednesday, February 22, 2006
10 talents to be a successful child care professional...
Hopefully this list will give you some things to consider.
1. Playfulness: Have you struggled to be more playful with the children? How have you nurtured that talent in yourself? Share your successes and struggles in the quest to be more playful in your interactions with your kids.
2. Responsiveness: When it comes to providing care, being "responsive" is complex. We have to recognize and identify our child's needs and figure out how to meet those needs. Often our own needs or feelings interfere. How have you nurtured the talent of responding to your child's needs?
3. Emotional Balance: Every provider has to handle highly emotional situations. It can be hard not to overreact or to withdraw when we are faced with intense feelings from our children or from within ourselves. How have you nurtured that ability to maintain emotional balance, to stay calm and positive under stress, to experience your own emotions without taking them out on your kids?
4. Understanding/Empathy: It's easy to focus on children's behavior - especially on their misbehavior. But if we look under the surface instead, at how they might be feeling, we are often in a better position to get things back on track. How have you nurtured that talent of seeing deep inside, understanding where a child's behavior is coming from, seeing the pain behind the problems?
5. Reflection: One of the best things providers can do to improve their caregiving skill is something that most of us have no time for: Reflection. How have you found the time and the energy to step back and think, write and talk about what it really means to be a parent? What's great about it, what's hard about it?
6. Resolution: It's easier for us to provide children with feelings of security if we have resolved our own childhood losses and traumas. The key isn't whether or not we have had a loss - everyone has - but whether we have dealt with it enough so that we can make a new attachment. What have you done to resolve the losses and traumas from your childhood? Have you taken time to tell these stories to someone you trust? Have you made peace with people who mistreated you - or figured out how to keep your distance from them?
7. Self-Acceptance: Most providers struggle with feeling inadequate or incompetent. One key talent of parenthood is letting go of self-criticism and self-blame. How have you nurtured acceptance of yourself, acknowledgment that you've always done the best you could - even if you wanted to do better?
8. Connection: Focusing on your relationship with the child helps ease power struggles and battles for control. How have you nurtured that talent of staying connected, even when life is stressful?
9. Outreach: I have seldom met a provider who gets enough support from family or parents - either practical support with dishes, tantrums, homework and nightmares or emotional support for the joys and despair of caring for children. How have you managed to get support? Who listens and pays attention to you - after you spend all day paying attention to your kids?
10. Trust: Parents worry, and there is no promise of calm serenity for any parent. But we can counteract worry with trust - trust in development, in our parenting, in the power of friendship and in children's resilience. How have you nurtured trust, instead of giving in to overwhelming worry?
What do you think? Is anything left off the list that should be there? Let me know your thoughts...
Hopefully this list will give you some things to consider.
1. Playfulness: Have you struggled to be more playful with the children? How have you nurtured that talent in yourself? Share your successes and struggles in the quest to be more playful in your interactions with your kids.
2. Responsiveness: When it comes to providing care, being "responsive" is complex. We have to recognize and identify our child's needs and figure out how to meet those needs. Often our own needs or feelings interfere. How have you nurtured the talent of responding to your child's needs?
3. Emotional Balance: Every provider has to handle highly emotional situations. It can be hard not to overreact or to withdraw when we are faced with intense feelings from our children or from within ourselves. How have you nurtured that ability to maintain emotional balance, to stay calm and positive under stress, to experience your own emotions without taking them out on your kids?
4. Understanding/Empathy: It's easy to focus on children's behavior - especially on their misbehavior. But if we look under the surface instead, at how they might be feeling, we are often in a better position to get things back on track. How have you nurtured that talent of seeing deep inside, understanding where a child's behavior is coming from, seeing the pain behind the problems?
5. Reflection: One of the best things providers can do to improve their caregiving skill is something that most of us have no time for: Reflection. How have you found the time and the energy to step back and think, write and talk about what it really means to be a parent? What's great about it, what's hard about it?
6. Resolution: It's easier for us to provide children with feelings of security if we have resolved our own childhood losses and traumas. The key isn't whether or not we have had a loss - everyone has - but whether we have dealt with it enough so that we can make a new attachment. What have you done to resolve the losses and traumas from your childhood? Have you taken time to tell these stories to someone you trust? Have you made peace with people who mistreated you - or figured out how to keep your distance from them?
7. Self-Acceptance: Most providers struggle with feeling inadequate or incompetent. One key talent of parenthood is letting go of self-criticism and self-blame. How have you nurtured acceptance of yourself, acknowledgment that you've always done the best you could - even if you wanted to do better?
8. Connection: Focusing on your relationship with the child helps ease power struggles and battles for control. How have you nurtured that talent of staying connected, even when life is stressful?
9. Outreach: I have seldom met a provider who gets enough support from family or parents - either practical support with dishes, tantrums, homework and nightmares or emotional support for the joys and despair of caring for children. How have you managed to get support? Who listens and pays attention to you - after you spend all day paying attention to your kids?
10. Trust: Parents worry, and there is no promise of calm serenity for any parent. But we can counteract worry with trust - trust in development, in our parenting, in the power of friendship and in children's resilience. How have you nurtured trust, instead of giving in to overwhelming worry?
What do you think? Is anything left off the list that should be there? Let me know your thoughts...
// posted by Tammy Wachter @ 5:30 PM 
