TKW Consulting

Helping parents feel comfortable with child care
By LuAnn Harris

Being separated when a child enters child care is a big adjustment for most parents and children. It's important for parents and child care providers to recognize that no matter how carefully they prepare for the difficulty of separation, there is bound to be some discomfort. Often, this is because parents have mixed feelings about leaving their child in the care of someone else for much of the day, particularly when the situation is new or the child is very young.Parents wonder if the child care provider will love their child. They are concerned about the quality of care the child will receive, the lessons the child will learn, and how the child will be treated.

Parents also worry about the safety of their child. Parents naturally feel anxious and guilty when they cannot personally provide the care they want for their child during their work hours, or guarantee the child's safety.

Other parents feel uncomfortable sharing their personal, private life with a child care provider. They may fear they will be criticized or judged, or worry that they may be made to feel stupid about child rearing. Some parents are afraid that their child will become more attached to the child care provider than to the parent.These feelings and emotions are very powerful and can sometimes lead parents to appear aggressive, demanding, and clingy. Parents and providers can ease these anxious feelings by considering the following tips:

• Recognize that these feelings are normal and something that nearly every parent experiences.
• Encourage open and frequent communication between parents and child care.
• Be honest. Separation is hard and no one should pretend that it is not.
• Become knowledgeable about the behaviors to expect from children during the early days of separation. This will help parents feel better about crying or clinging children.
• Share feelings. Both parents and providers may be feeling some anxiety.
• Share observations that show the child is happy, healthy, and being well cared for.
• Keep a positive, supportive attitude.

Parents and providers want child care to be a good place for children. Everyone can reach a point of comfort if these difficult emotions are accepted and by understanding the protective urge that both parents and providers feel for children. For more information contact Child Care Resource & Referral.

LuAnn Harris is the director of Child Care Resource and Referral.

// posted by Tammy Wachter @ 6:58 PM